The poem below is not entirely a work of fiction and may reflect the poet's own experiences with engineering exams and the (lack of) pre exam stress..

आज मी नक्की करणारच असा रोज ठरवत राहते ,

झोप  मात्र  काळ्या मांजरी सारखी माझ्या वाटेत  आडवी जाते !

रोज सकाळी snooze करायचा मग alarm लावायचीच का भानगड ?

उठून स्वताची  समजूत  काढायची "तसा तो chapter नाहीये फारसा अवघड "!

P.L आहे ही म्हणे ,दिवाळी ची सुट्टी  कधी संपली ?

लगेच काय परीक्षा ,मुले submissions नी दमली !

मित्रांना  सकाळ -संध्याकाळ "किती झाले ?"विचारत बसणे ,

मग दशा तीच  आहे समजून "हुश्श  "म्हणून हसणे !

काय किती अवघड आहे यावर सगळ्यांशी  चर्चा करतो ,

मग तेवढ्याच वेळात ते करूनही झाले असते हे कळण्यास का बरे हरतो ?

परीक्षेच्या काळात अचानक T.v मालिकांमध्ये चांगले  चांगले घडायला लागते ,

दर १० मिनिटांनी बाहेर जाऊन पाणी पिल्याशिवाय  थोडी न तहान भागते !

T.V बघून बघून त्याचेच तत्व आचरणात आले ,

काम थोडेच झाले  आणि breaks झाले मोठाले !

आज झाला नाही आई पण उद्या नक्की करणारे ,

माहित  नाही कधीपर्यंत तो "उद्या " येण्याची ते वाट पाहत राहणारे !

परीक्षेनंतरच्या सुट्टीचे जोरदार "planning" करत बसतो ,

एवढे planning परीक्षेचे केले असते तर पहीलेच अलो असतो !

नाही ,आता केलेच पाहिजे म्हणून जरा मनावर घ्यायचे ,

आणि  कधीच आचरणात न आणू  असे timetable करून लावायचे !

१००० परीक्षा आयुष्यात दिल्या आता ही ही एक देऊ ,

आई -बाबांनी जेवढे tension घेतले त्यातले थोडे आपणही घेऊ !

पण जो पर्यंत coffee घेऊन आदल्या दिवशी जागत नाही ,

तो पर्यंत वाटतच नाही आपण अभ्यास केलाय काही !

Its been exactly 24 days since I joined facebook..Well,I thought it would be fun to put my thoughts and observations into a poem..so here it goes..(would love to hear what you think abt it)

"FACEBOOK"kela join,kay ahe te hota pahaycha,
cinemasarkha magcha darwaza hoto banda ata kayam ithech rahaycha~
15 minitach baseen tharavle pan zalyat matra adakle,
... minitanche taas zhale ithe aai-baba bhadakle.
facebook var lavnyasathich photo kadayche muddam,
mag likes n comments alyat ka baghne hech hota apla kaam.
ekach shaleche apan dogha mhanje zhalo apan mitra,
mag tevhach ka bollo nahi tyanchashi vatat nahi ka vichitra?
shezarcha kutrazari bhunkla tari jagala sangava lagte,
aplya jeevnat kay chalue kalyashivay kharach konache adte?
mitranbarobar "share" karne mhanje tyana jokes sangne nhave,
jyana baghun offline palto tyanche mitrach ka vhave?
aaz kuthe konabarobar gelo he saglyana sangayche,
nahitar lyf "happening" nahi ase lokana vatayche!
facebook adhi mitra hota ata zhalay velecha chor,
pan karayla hi kahi naste jevha gharat hote bore!
doorche mitra hi bhetat ani zunya guppa hotat,
pan khare aplyala kay vatte rahte fakta aplya potat.
facebook var hazar mitra pahun he jag matra faste,
pan kharya don mitranmadhe "WALL" kadhich naste~

Tried my hand at writing a story for the first time..would love to hear your views : ) Special Thanks to my sister Nidhi for her valuable suggestions :)

I'm sitting here at my usual place in the window,a place that has come to be my safe haven.As i drag myself through the day.I look forward to this special time.I find myself here most evenings and albeit its sense of melancholy I have come to cherish it.Today is another such day of the thousands i have spent here reflecting on my life,looking for answers..
     I gaze into the indigo sky,today appearing starless as angry clouds encompass the sky.The clouds are waging a war of their own as if mirroring my own inner turmoil.Lightning strikes;momentarily lighting up the darkness,a bleak promise that the tempest would soon pass.I pull my jacket closer as the impetuous winds whistle through the winds.The windows behind me rattle and i feel myself shudder;the spell momentarily broken.The warmth of the house seems almost welcome now.It takes only a moments hesitation for I have made up my mind.Today I'm going to see the end of it..
         I stare into the never-ending darkness and i feel like i'm staring into the future,my future;an endless path leading  nowhere..I'm running from the past,hiding from the future,stuck in a dreary present I'm fighting every moment to change..The future lies in the acceptance of the past,something i have been fighting against.I've been fighting against fate,fighting against the truth that has come to change my life.I know i am fighting a lost battle but i cant give up.Not yet.
           Sometimes i cant help but wonder 'What happened to me?' 'What did I do to deserve this?'Innumerable questions that have come to haunt my life.I need to find the answers for the answers would help me find something I have lost long back.I want to find myself agaiin..This isnt a life I'm leading..It's become a life sentence for me..
           Thunder booms in the distance drowning my inner voice,bringing me back to the moment.I heave a sigh,close my eyes and spread my hands wide letting the droplets trickle down my palms.The feeling is almost magical.For the briefest of moments i felt alive,I felt like everything would be okay.I take in the familiar smell of mud;beckoning me to step out,urging me to let go of my inhibitions.
              "I'm not ready yet" I whisper..I'm not ready to face whats out there,to leave the safety of the walls I've created around myself..I close the curtains with my shaking hands.After what seems like an eternity,i walk back into the house.It feels warm but not comforting.I'm greeted with an eerie silence..like i dont belong here;like I'm needed elsewhere..
            "I'm not ready yet"I scream.my voice bounding off the walls.."If you're not ready today ,you never will be"the voice inside my head says..I let the voice take over my senses as i head towards the door;my legs making a decision of their own..I trust my instincts and as I open the door and step out into the garden I know somewhere in my heart that i did just the right thing.
      I spread  my arms wide and look at the sky.It seemed like the most natural thing to do.The raindrops brush gently against my face becoming one with my tears.I take a deep breath and rivel in the moment.I stand there for what seems like hours,the raindrops showering on me as if to fill the void within.The tears fall uncontrollably;the chilly wind burns against my skin.But it doesnt matter today;Today I will be brave..I'm engulfed by the darkness which seems to be closing in on me..
      I look around and say your name..over and over again..begging pleading,searching for you in the darkness..I know i had to find you..It was the only thing that kept me going.I lost the track of time as i stood there,saying your name like a prayer till I could do it no more.I felt my knees buckle as I fell towards the ground.The house seems miles away;a journey I had no reason to take.I hugged myself,knowing in my heart that I had failed.I give up today for there seems no reason to fight.
   As I lay in the ground,beaten,I heard my name..my entire body shuddered.It's a trick my eyes are playing on me I told myself..but that voice..It had to be you.."Open your eyes"the voice said.My heart was thudding against my chest.I couldn't open my eyes afraid that the dream would end.But what did I have to lose?I opened my eyes slowly,my breathing now heavy and turned towards the voice.I looked up into your gentle face;the face I've been longing to see.As i looked into the eyes,I felt complete;like the pain was worth it
"They say you're gone" my voice barely audible.
"Did you believe them?"
"Not even for an instant"I vowed,my voice sounding childlike.
I hear your familiar laugh and remember all those times we sat together here.when happiness had reached its zenith.Today it feels like one of those days;like everything is just the same.Nothing ever changed
       The golden moon emerged,breaking through the darkness.As I sat there in the moonlight,I knew I had never felt more beautiful.
"Is there something you need to ask me love?"Your voice seemed so calm and reassuring like you could make everything right in an instant.And then the words escaped my lips..the question I wanted to ask you..
            "Why didnt you take me with you?"I accused.
"I love you too much to do that" you say as you hold my hand,your fingers filling the gaps in mine like they were made for each other.The moment for just so beautiful,and I knew I could fight a thousand battles for that priceless moment with you.
       "I wished for a miracle"I say"But he didnt give me any" as I look tearfully at the sky..
"Everyone gets only one miracle and I think we already got ours"
You are my miracle"
A gentle smile plays on my lips as i hold your gaze;wishing more that ever that time would stand still.
"I dont want to live without you"my voice almost pleading..
"I'm right here,always have been.I am the voice in your head that tells you what to do.I am the rays of sunshine that wake you up in the morning.I will be whatever you want me to be.I am a part of you.I'm right here in your heart and nothing can ever change that.You cant give up now,you have to live for the two of us..I promise to look after you.I'll be your guardian angel."
       You put a flower in my palm and say"You found me and loved me and just like a flower you certified my existence..You have to try love.Try to be happy for then I will be happy too."
            I nod as my eyes start giving up,the weariness of the day catching up with me.I feel weak and tired as i try to battle it out.
"Will you put me to sleep?"I murmur,talking more to myself than you.
"yes".."like always"you add..
Theres just one question I needed to ask you as I gathered my remaining strength.
          "Are you real,or is this a dream?"
         "Whatever you want to believe,love"
 
  I wake up in the morning with a throbbing headache as the sunlight greets me into a new day..I rub my eyes as I take in the familiar sights of my own bedroom..I dont remember getting into bed last night.
Was last night a dream?I rush towards the windows and look outside..
The garden shows no signs of the fearsome storm..
           The storm was not outside..it was inside me.The storm inside me is now over,and i feel surprisingly at peace with myself.I know that I can go on..I turn to leave when I spot the flower on my bedside..I hold the flower gently and bring it to my lips..
               I know now what to believe..: )

This is something i wrote after reading Nicholas Spark's "The Notebook"..Its an amazing book..If u have read it then u'll be able to understand the poem on a different level :)

वाट पहिली खूप तुझी  मागे वळून पहिले,

तू निघून गेलास तुझ्हे विचार फक्त राहिले~

कधी उठून वाटते तू होता नाहीस न स्वप्ना?

कोणता खेळ हा खेळतोस बस कर न हे लपणं~

अश्रू मला आवरत नाहीत शोधू कुठे मी तुला?

तुझही सावली जरी दिसली तरी धन्य वाटेल मला~

डोळ्यातले हे अश्रू थांबवू थांबतच नाही कसले,

तुझ्या त्या गोड शब्दांना का मात्र मन फसले?

तू इथेच आहेस जवळ असा होतो मला भास,

परत येशील तू कधी एवढीच जागायची आस ~

Farewell Fairytale

I look around me,i dont belong here,
I am swept by the crowd; m gripped with fear..

How did I end up like this,no-one seems to know,
Theres no strength in me now,i just let the tears flow..

I look around frantically,say your name like a prayer,
I hear that familiar laugh, and my cheeks flood with color

I turn around to see the face i know best,
 The  face that  seems  to  promise to take care of the rest..

I see that amazed look in your dark familiar eyes,
In a flash you're real;i feel my heartbeat rise!

Everything else seems to blur as we stand in the crowd,
whisper my name once;your silence seems unbearably loud!!

I'm just so nervous,keep tugging at my shirt,
your smile makes me almost forget the way I've been hurt!

For a moment i want to believe that all would be fine,
that once belonged to me would always be mine..

The day etched in my memory when you confirmed my worst fears,
What was i to do??i'd succumbed to my tears..

Day n night your words echo in my head,
but my heart still refuses to believe even a thing that you said~

But I wasnt surprised,I had seen this coming,
We had to face the truth one day,I was tired of running~

Words hurled at each other,each day a battleground
But  wasnt  that to protect what special we'd found?

Were we both wrong,or were we both right I wonder,
But wasnt it worth fighting for,why did you surrender?

For someone who saw the"extra" in ths ordinary me,
the truth my eyes betrayed how could you fail to see?

I just want to hold you ;nothing against you,
for we both are to blame ;it was a chance we blew.

We had something special but then you let go,
all we had to leave behind was our ego!!

What happened to our promises,the beautiful forever?
Now all thats left are your memories to savour..

It was a fairy-tale but not the ending i chose,
your place is by my side,yet today we stand as foes~

Never really imagined that we'd end up this way,
You seem to go still  further away with every passing day!

I thought i knew you best,but I'll have to start anew,
For Ive realised I can bring out not just the best but also the worst in you!

The colours you painted my life with,are here to stay,
Cauz the most turbulent of rains cant wash them away..~

We arent to be measured in years but by our infinite moments,
All wrapped up and kept safe like beautiful presents..

But wasnt it worth giving another chance?
Didnt I have the right to ask for one last dance?

I miss you like hell,i know you feel the same,
so lets just stop playing the "i dont care" game..

I'd won you over only to lose myself now,
Who was i believe u'd think back on your vow?

So much to say,but all i manage is a smile,
In a matter of seconds we seem to have travelled a mile..

You nod politely.then turn to walk away,
Pride holds  me back from asking you to stay..

I turn to return to the mundane.yet i smile through a sigh,
For somewhere i know this isnt the final goodbye..!!

For my 12th std friends..This poem is dedicated to the 2 lessons in chemistry we all loved....to leave!!

F block म्हणतो D block ला आपल्याला का सगळे सोडतात?

मुले सर्व आपल्या पासून का मुह मोडतात?

 

D block म्हणतो खरतर मी नाहीये इतका अवघड,

पण पाठ एवढा करायची नको असते मुलांना भानगड!

 

F Block म्हणतो मुला समाझतात खूपच "बोर",

वाटते त्यांना माझ्हाशिवाय पण ते करू शकतील स्कोर!

 

Textbook  चा  आपल्या पानांना हाथ न लागला कधी,

क्लास्सेस चा आपल्या नोटस न मुला समझ्तात रद्दी!

 

थोड्या वर्शनी आपले अस्तित्व text मधून कापतील,

किंवा text मध्ये नवा समोर "option "  असेच छापतील !!!

Should we have the Board exam as well as the CET??We all have something to say about this,dont we?Well,heres what the Board exam and Cet have to say to each other..

बो-यशाची पायरी नाही झालोय मी अडथला,
आज माझे  नाव ऐकून मुलांचा पोटात येई ना कळा.

सी - निबंधासारखी ती उत्तर मुला करतात बिचारी,
अभ्यासाबरोबर ३ तास बसायची पण त्यांना करावी लागते तयारी !

बो-मुलांचा भविष्य ठरवायचा तुला दिलाय कोणी हक्क?
१०० प्रश्न कसा ठरवणार मुलगा हुशार आहे कि मक्ख?

सी- Textbook घोकून पण मुलगा येऊ शकतो बोर्डात पहिला
मुलांची योग्यता ठरवण्यात म्हणून तू मागे राहिला!

बो-मोठे स्वप्न बघायची देत आहेसका त्यांना शिक्षा?
१ मिनिटाचा आत गणित सोडव हि कसली अपेक्षा?

 सी- sms चा पिढीत सगळे झले नाही का फास्ट?
Concepts असतील क्लीअर तर मुला राहू शकतात बिनधास्त 

बो-तुझ्हा परीक्षेत नशीबाचा आहे मोठा हाथ,
काय करणार मुला झार दिला नाही त्या दिवशी साथ?

सी-मेहनतीत कमी पडतात ते असतात नशीबाला दोष देणारे
उद्या आयुष्यात प्रोब्लेम्स "Date and Time"देऊन येणारे ?

बो-भाषा  येत नसली तर पुढे कसा जाणार?
आपले विचार मांडण्यात तो  नाही का हरणार?

सी-तुझ्हा examiners ना येत नाही काही असा लागलाय आरोप,
गावात पेपर नाही ना जाणार विचाराने मुलांची उडते झोप
Computerized checking ने या सर्व चुका टाळतात,
माझ्या मुळेच किती क्लास्सेस चे धंदे चालतात
                आपल्या दोघांचा बोलण्यात आहे तसे तथ्य,
                         आपले हे भांडण आहे व्यर्थ,
                                सगळ्या मुलांना रडवून ते दोघा मात्र  हसले,
                                         त्यांचा एक मे ओर एक तू मध्ये सगळे मात्र फसले!!!!

Dont write me off just yet

I look at the doctor with questions in my eyes,
I want the truth for once,is it time for goodbyes?

Friends and Family all huddled around my bed,
Grief etched on their faces to see where fate has led!

The usual well-rehearsed lines “everything will be okay”,
I wish they would themselves believe the things that they say.

They think I dont see the tears they push away,
Words fail me;I nod and sigh keeping emotions at bay.

For if the tears start now,I know they’ll never stop,
I’ll lose the strength  I’ve gathered with every passing drop.

Their names I barely remember,here at my beck ‘n’ call,
I want to live;Give me a chance to thank them all.

There is a secret i want them to know,
Its just not my time to go..

I stare into the immeasusable darkness all throughout the night,
Afraid to close my eyes,afraid I’ll never see the light.

I look at the stars;they are beautiful tonight
But I cant join them yet;i still got to fight.

I would never ask for someone’s help;always thought it was beneath me
Someone elses blood flows through my veins,i smile at the irony.

To a selfless deed,so pure and sublime
I owe my every breath,I’m on borrowed time.

The thought makes me feel warm,like there's someone who cares,
Grant me my life today so i can grant someone theirs.

Images of my life flash before my eyes,
I’ve never lived a moment,just a bunch of lies.

I started off as me then somehow lost my way,
Went with the crowd not where my heart lay!

The past is already sold,the future's on rent
Theres something i want from you,gift me the PRESENT!

Never believed in miracles,please prove me wrong
Theres gotto be some hope,I’m still hanging on.

I’m tired of pretending,just want to be me,
Give me a chance to become what I was meant to be!

My purpose remains unfulfilled,You’ve just gotto wait
For then i promise I’ll gladly embrace my fate!

I’ll make it worthwhile let my fate manuveur,
The show’s not over yet,Dont let the curtains lower!

Even as i go i want to be a beautiful sunset,
DONT WRITE ME OFF JUST YET……!